Updated: Sep 7
To varying degrees, everyones journey of parenthood differs...
Perhaps you sailed through pregnancy, had severe nausea, a lengthy IVF process, adoption or any number of different scenarios.
However, the moment a child comes into your life, it is usually the same story ~ you look at them and vow to do the best you possibly can and you cannot imagine harming them for one second.
The love you feel is like nothing you’ve experienced before!
As your child grows, you may face many challenges, be it a scare that sends you rushing to hospital, an unexpected medical diagnosis, tantrums that have you completely exhausted, thoughts of Autism... These are just some examples, the list goes on.
There may be days or nights (maybe several) that have you at your ‘wits’ end, you may experience annoyance that you didn’t realise was even possible. There may be flashes of thoughts as to what it would be like to just have a moments peace ~ on top of this is the guilt! No one told us about that one, and if they did; we could never know the true feeling of it until it’s experiential.
After my own son was born and I had a very deep and profound Spiritual ‘Self Realisation’ experience, there was a deep and crystal clear seeing of our True Nature here ~ let's say that with fresh eyes, I am able to see through life from the highest truth, rather than from conditioned beliefs.
This isn’t to say that suddenly everything appeared perfect… In short, my son had an illness, relentless tantrums, was a very poor sleeper and I went through many child counselling sessions and parenting courses. Life as a Realised Being doesn’t automatically take these human situations away.
However, having had more Spiritual Insights than I can remember, I can tell you what I know about children.
Just like us, our children are Spiritual beings. Their True nature (just like ours) IS Infinite Consciousness (other words are often used for this). They, just like us, are here to 'Realise' THIS ~ hence the term ‘Self Realisation’.
There is NOTHING more important here than Realising the truth of who we really are. In fact, the reason for our time here IS to Realise THIS 🙏
We can accumulate great wealth, a beautiful home and car, even land our ideal job ~ all of these things are a beautiful gift of living this human life and there is nothing wrong with wanting to lead a comfortable life. HOWEVER the ultimate ‘prize’ (let's say) is the one of returning home to the heart and realising who YOU truly are.
Who we ALL really are is actually plain and simple; however, this can appear complicated because of the deep conditioned beliefs we have accumulated over our lifetimes.
The truth IS that we are made of Love energy and Love is all there IS... Everything else is an illusion ~ a conditioned belief past down the generations.
Every perceived challenge from our children IS an invitation HOME ~ home to the Truth of who we are ~ and who better to show us this and to STOP us in our tracks than the ones who we love so dearly.
A common belief is that our children know less than we do and that we’re here to guide them; however there is something far deeper going on in this relationship dynamic…
Yes of course, we must take care of, guide, clothe and feed our children ~ however our children are also OUR guides (in the main they are unconscious of this fact). When we become aware of this, the relationship becomes far smoother and far less complicated ~ it becomes (let's say) 'as plain as the nose on our faces'.
Children are little Divine Spiritual Beings that we (WE ~ as in the True Self) chose to turn us upside down and inside out until there is nowhere else for us to turn but INward. They also unconsciously chose us for the same in return.
If we find ourselves acting in any way detrimentally different to what we imagined when our child first came into our life, then we can take this wake up call ~ as an INvitation… What is going on? What are we being shown? What needs to change? In what direction do we need to be looking?
This does not mean that we should spoil our children, let them do whatever they want or not guide them from wrong to right, however there is a lot more going on and it IS actually truly beautiful ~ Beyond words!
This is NEVER about ‘trying’ or ‘forcing’ a change on our child, it is always about looking INWARD, because everything outside of ourselves is a reflection of inside of ourselves ~ If our child is triggering something within us, what is it within us that is not coming from the truth of who we Really are?
And the amazing news about this, is that once WE truly make the change, our children automatically change too... This IS because 'every' single thing is made of energy ~ change the energy from WITHIN and the outside will automatically catch up and reflect this.
It IS that simple!
But what about conditions such as Autism and so on ~ well these are simply labels… This is not to say that these traits don’t exist ~ of course they do. Even after the deep and clear Self Realisation experienced here, I sought professional guidance to steer some areas on track and was assisted by some absolutely amazing people.
But ultimately, how do we get the best from our children? How do we get the behaviour from them that we want to see? ~ The simple answer is ‘Love & Kindness’. There is nothing more to it than this.
The answer is to become clear within the heart of who you truly are and in this space, not only will we live from the heart-space but also the divine answers to certain situations will naturally start to arise from withIN more and more.
Have you ever noticed that when you slow down, when you pay your child undivided attention, when you speak to them calmly, when you say nice things to them, praise them and so on that they respond differently? This is because the energy has changed.
But what if things don’t change? ~ what if we’ve tried to do things differently but our children are as testing as always?... This is because we’re ‘trying’ rather than ‘being’ on a different energy frequency.
The REAL genuine change is needed from WITHIN the-self. The clearer you become in your Self realisation process, the more miraculous and automatic the outer world reflects this and if circumstantial changes are needed to be made, the answers will arise from the silent insight of the heart space within you.
Our children are a reflection of US. This is just how it is. Change from the inside and the outside will automatically catch up to reflect this ~ the system IS perfect! 🙏
And if we don’t become aware of this? what happens then? ~ The cycle simply continues until there is nowhere to go but to make the change within.
The children in your life are THIS! ~ Divine beings inviting you to Realise your True Nature and this is simply beautiful (beyond words) when Realised 🙏
(Dedicated to my darling boy Elliott, pictured with me below).