Why “Just Think Positively” Doesn’t Work and What Actually Helps

When going through a difficult situation or low mood, we often hear people say, “Just think positively!”

Annoying, right?

The truth is ~ we can’t actually just do this.

In fact, trying to think positively can actually cause more tension: annoyance, frustration, guilt… you name it.

Ask yourself: have you ever actually chosen a thought?

If we could choose thoughts, wouldn’t we simply pick only great ones?

Thoughts appear and disappear. They’re not something we control ~ and they’re not even ours.

I mean… imagine trying to think positively all day. Wowzers. What a chore!

So what can we do?

Well, as I often point out ~ there’s no “doing” to be done.

If thoughts arise on their own, the key is simply awareness.

When we’re unaware ~ when we’re identified with thought ~ we believe we are the thinker. And in doing so, we get caught up, give thoughts importance, and feed their emotional charge.

But witnessing is all that’s required ~ gently observing without reaction ~ along with allowing ourselves to fully feel whatever emotion arises.

And it’s important to say: this witnessing does not come from the mind.

If this is new for you, it might feel unfamiliar at first. Things may even seem to intensify before they soften. That’s okay.

Witnessing is a whole-being experience ~ a full allowing of what is.

If it helps, imagine your awareness gently dropping downward ~ like sinking into a warm, soothing bath.

Witnessing allows us to notice what’s happening without reacting to it.

It allows thoughts to come and go, observed from the vast open space of awareness.

(And it’s doing this anyway ~ whether we realise it or not).

When we stop feeding thoughts and their energetic charge (fear, anger, etc.), they begin to lose their grip.

Over time, this gentle allowing creates more space within.

In that space, positivity ~ and all those yummy feelings we chase ~ naturally arise on their own.

No striving, no reaching, no forcing.

Sounds simple, right? But if you find this difficult (which is very common), it’s important to witness that too ~ and not give yourself a hard time about that either.

And although there’s no “doing” involved, it can help to notice things you’re grateful for ~ even the tiniest ones.

A soothing breath.

A soft pillow.

A warm bath.

A moment of stillness.

Just be mindful not to turn gratitude into a rigid practice or a thing you “must” do. Gratitude, too, can simply be noticed ~ arising and passing like everything else.

The more we practice awareness ~ simply noticing ~ the more familiar it becomes.

And in time, we recognise: this state of presence is our natural way of being and gratitude arises naturally from this space of awareness too.

💜

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